Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Season Premiere Review: Two and a Half Men-"Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt"

Ashton Kutcher joins the cast of "Two and a Half Men"
Credit: CBS

Some quick thoughts on the premiere of Two and a Half Men are after the jump.

I wasn't expecting to like this premiere. 

This show has reached a point where it does what it does. I've known for awhile that removing Charlie Sheen from the equation won't completely change the show. It will still be Jon Cryer, Angus T. Jones, Ashton Kutcher, and the rest of the cast (sometimes literally) sitting around and telling dirty jokes. That's not a show that I want to watch on a weekly basis. But I understood that before picking the premiere off my DVR. I knew this would be an episode of television that I would not like.

It didn't even take me five minutes to be reminded of my dislike for this show. Charlie's funeral was a completely misguided scene. I understand that the writers wanted to poke fun at the character and have fun with him not being on the show anymore, but it came off as crude and crass. I couldn't imagine anyone putting up with that kind of behavior at a funeral, even Charlie Harper's. This continues with them essentially urinating on Charlie's memory for the first half of the episode. The only funny moment in those moments came from Rose telling the story of Charlie's death.

The rest of the premiere rose from dreadful to slightly tolerable. Once Ashton Kutcher entered the picture, it rose to a certain level of mediocrity. It rose to the level at which it has been sitting for the past several seasons. The jokes in the second half were decent, but not hysterically funny. I chuckled a few times at what Ashton Kutcher did, but even those weren't full on laughs.

Speaking of Ashton Kutcher, he should fit in well with the show. He seemed game for anything (judging by how he spent about 3-5 minutes of the episode nude). He seems like he would be willing to do what the show needs him to do to replace Charlie Sheen. Based on his prior history with "That's 70's Show," he should be fine here. This episode didn't tell me too much about how he will be used on the show, but it told me enough. He will own the house and sleep with lots of women in it. (Sound Familiar?)

Some other thoughts:

  • Although I have never seen Dharma and Greg, thanks to the internet I did realize that they looked at the house. I won't be able to provide a huge perspective on their brief cameo.
  • John Stamos! As someone who spent a night at the Harper house. Not so funny there, sorry Stamos.
  • Jake isn't given much to do here besides fart and comment that he's hungry. Tell me 2.5 Men fans, is this true all the time?
  • Apparently, Ashton Kutcher has a really big penis, which is good for a ton of punchlines. Not one of them were funny.
This seemed like required viewing for me because of the sheer amount of hype this had behind it. (It must have seemed that way to 30 million Americans as well.) Now that this is behind us, I never have to watch this mess of a TV show again.

What did everyone else think?

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